"Crazy Downtown" by Allan Sherman

Mommy and dad are never nervous or mad 
when you teenagers go downtown. 
Daddy and mom just stay and home and keep calm 
and watch the late-late show uptown 
Cos when you kids are gone we get to 
spend some time alone here 
Thats our only chance to use 
the bathtub or the phone here 
when youre away 
Besides were stuck where we are 
Because you kids took our money 
You kids took our car and went downtown 
Where can you possibly... downtown 
Its 20 after 3 -- downtown 
What do you mean by lets frug? 

You dont come home till 4 am cos youre roaming 
in the streets somewhere downtown 
We would feel swell if only someone could tell us 
what goes on down there downtown 
But everytime we ask you 
What youre doing after dark there 
You just say that you were frugging 
To Petula Clark there 
Thats what I mean 
So kids, give your folks a break 
Because youre driving us crazy 
We sit here all night and take pills down 
Swallowing pills so well calm down 
Counting the hours youre downtown 
You and your frug and your slop 

Do do do do do do ... downtown 
Do do do do do do ... downtown 

While were lying there 
We try to watch the television 
Then you call us up and say 
Youve had a slight collision 
There goes the car! 
Besides that youve been arrested 
So weve gotta get up 
And weve gotta get dressed and go downtown 
Borrow a car and go downtown 
Thats where you are, you finks -- Downtown 
Waitll I get you kids home! 


Therell be no more frugging, no swimming, no jerk, no mashed
potato, no 
slop, and Ill tell you something else, youre gonna stay home
tomorrow 
night, and your mother and I are going downtown and were
gonna dance the 
tango and the waltz and the foxtrot and were going to do the
bunny hop, 
those are nice dances, and therell be no more frugging, is
that quite 
clear? NO... MORE... FRUGGING!